When Your 'Crazy' Becomes Everyone's Normal

For me this has been an awesome time because it's like the whole world is living like my everyday normal...everyday it's me and my kids. I work from home and my kids are home educated. If we're out, if you see me without my kids it's a rarity where I have escaped for a couple hours with the babysitter watching her shows or helping fold laundry while they nap. Social distancing is something I have done as I can be low-key germaphobe but am I really? Cause errrbody's now doing what I normally have done. Sneeze around me and I'm immediately holding my breath and backing up. Don't. Touch. My. Kids. After a few sicknesses and a fungal infection that took months to clear up on my son with subsequent bald spots that took about half a year to completely fill back in - yeah, no. I teach my kids about the personal space bubble (arm's length all the way around). I've never been one that was highly social - I love the peaceful quiet environment I have established in my home. Not to say that there aren't hiccups, after all I have 4 kids all under 7. But I have established that we are to maintain an environment of peace and tranquility - I'm really the loudest and I have toned that down...somewhat - I can just be loud sometimes.

This season what turned into practically the whole year and still going, has been, ultimately, peaceful. Because the expectation was to shelter in place and stay away from each other there was lifted off of me the normal vicissitudes of life and I so needed that after the past few years where there was constant expectation and expected compliance to demands that I did not agree with but could do nothing about. About this time last year we were heading into our second set of adoptions which would release us completely from the foster care system and all of the things I hated about it. I was looking forward to just. Just being, just living, just resting, just exhaling, just peace. And that's what I did heading into the new year. I intended to focus on family time and just being free to do whatever, whenever. I let my daughter get a second piercing just because I could and she said she wanted a second earring like me. That was so freeing. Family time and reconnecting as that last year was a doozy. My focus was the finish line and everything else blended in the background as I pushed toward that mark like a robot forcing myself to not collapse. That day we walked out free and my load so much lighter. We went right to the aquarium as if it were any other day. For me, I just wanted the papers - did not need the whole court proceedings and it is interesting as that was not an option but a few months later it would be the only option due to the pandemic. I just received my daughters' birth certificates from our almost a year ago adoption. And as we are now have now stepped into this holiday season, it is with getting ready to welcome a new daughter. Yes, you heard - or read - that right. Within the next 10 days we will have our new daughter home with us. She is about to be three months old and that was a journey before the journey even began but that will take a few entries to relay.

So this year has been a blessing in more ways than one or even five. I have grown a lot and become reacquainted with myself and the 2.0 or is it like 5.0 at this point? Prolly 10.0 :D I'm going into the new year with pretty much the same goals as last year because that train just totally ran off the track but we're easing it back on now and this new child marks a new beginning for our family. I knew of her last year - at the same time that I knew for sure there was another child was the same area of time that this little girl was conceived. Mind-blowing. I'm grateful for my kids, my life, our home, all our disgusto animals two of which started my Thanksgiving by messing in their crates. Yep, that's my life - wouldn't change a thing except we need a bigger house. I am finally back to blogging and podcasting and have re-prioritized and moved forward in the vision I've had for the platform I started building two years ago and focusing more on doing of the things I love and being the me that God saw when He put me into the earth.

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